Derren brown the illusionist and trickster this week lifted the lid on his secrets and blew away the mystique that surrounds his supposedly improbable tricks and conjuring.
"The explanation is quite simple to be honest and when I reveal just how I manage to bamboozle, bewilder and baffle people in the manner which I do, people will literally kick themselves for overlooking such an obvious resolution."
"Back in 1995 I as looking for inspiration from a strong willed individual with strength of conviction and immense mental fortitude, that person was Kevin Keegan. I used to follow his press conferences and eaves drop on his half time team talks, I thought to myself this guy has it all, he could encourage, get the team working as one, and was focused beyond compare."
"But all that began to change that Christmas as someone I can only describe as having telepathic or other para-psychological ability came onto the scene and before a nations very eyes and ears systematically destroyed Kevin Keegas mind, a man previously thought to be unbreakable, or ‘bomb-proof’, leading to his famous ‘I would love it’ outburst followed by a mental breakdown and subsequent Sectioning in a secure unit."
"That man as we all know is the master of mind games himself, Alex Ferguson. A magician among mere mortals."
"I have been studying under the great man now for many years, learning how to manipulate peoples minds and create whatever illusions and false realities I choose. I once made Bobby Davro think that Barry and Paul Chuckle were trying to kill him with a spoon, and if you think that’s good, all this was going on on the surface of the moon! As far as Bavro was concerned in any event; and all this was made possible due to Alex Fergusons tips and other worldly Faculties."
"Its not hard to see how he amazingly enlisted the help of portly football genius Sam Allardyce to completely perplex Rafael Benitez recently. He had completely lost the plot, as he sat there calmly reading out a list of things that actually happened, or facts as he crazily referred to them as, it was obvious to all and every football pundit that he had gone totally bananas! I mean he could have started throwing his own faeces around and looked calmer, the man was insanity personified. And as we all know its down that great man Alex Ferguson yet again."
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